Ladies, how frustrating is it when you have sex with someone and five minutes into horrible dirty talk, and non-strategic ass smacking, you realize the person you are mid-stroke with, knows little if not nothing about the anatomy of a woman? I’ve been there all too many times: the cruise control rhythm, and weird porn reenactments, pain me even now to think about.
It’s like every time they watch, they pick up a little B.S., and lose a little bit of common sense with it. They treat porn like the holy grail, instead of simply remembering the basics. Before you know it, you’re in the middle of a one rhythm porn scene, of which you won’t be reimbursed for because neither of you are pay-roll Pornstars. Adding toys, tricks, and props are always great to add to the bedroom, but they mean nothing if you can’t even achieve the fundamentals. Let’s go back to the basic’s and ensure you start having better sex ASAP:
Foreplay is a Major Key for Better Sex
I don’t like wasting time to impart the obvious amongst the clueless, so I’m not going to go into great detail for this one. The major key to better sex is taking your time instead of rushing. Ladies, it takes us up to 20 minutes to be ready for sex; make sure your partner is taking their sweet time to get you hot, excited and lubricated, before diving in. Make them admire you body, caress your curves, and kiss you until you melt (literally).
The Clit is It
A large amount of us require clitoral stimulation to successfully orgasm, making the clit the true holy grail of sex. Once they have found this magical area it is crucial to know it can be stimulated using their tongue, hands, penis or toy, so there’s no excuse for you to be dissatisfied. Always remember, be gentle with the clit, don’t press down directly on it, make sure it is lubricated, and focus on creating lots of movements, and vibrations.
Don’t Forget Our Breasts
Aside from being flat out sexy, our breasts are also an erogenous zone, and is home to one of the most sensitive sweet spots for us: our nipples. The sensation from our nipples feel so amazing because they travel to the same part of the brain as sensations from the vagina and clitoris. When focusing on nipples, remember to be gentle (unless asked otherwise), use your fingers to gently squeeze pinch and flick, and your mouth to kiss, suck and nibble. However, don’t just limit your stimulant’s to fingers and mouth, I won’t get too raunchy, but you can use sex toys (vibrator’s, nipple clamps etc.) and other body parts to arouse the nipples.
We Can Play Rough
Some people believe the only way for women to have better sex, is by enjoying romantic, delicate sex that includes staring deep into each other’s eyes while Maxwell’s “A Woman’s Worth” plays in the background. FALSE: first of all, unless we’re madly in love, staring deep into my eyes is guaranteed to get awkward. We enjoy intensity and aggression, just like men do; have them pull your hair, spank you, lightly choke and command your attention, they should be grabbing you by the waist with a fiery passion that says “this is mine”.
Switch it Up
We can appreciate a good ol classic, one-rhythm doggy style encounter every once in a while, however it’s essential to change the speed and position up often to avoid boredom. Research “Kamasutra” for position ideas, and whip out your new moves the next time they go for the basic missionary position.
Kiss
It’s so easy to forget about something so simple and intimate as a kiss. Lips have more nerve endings than most other parts of your bodies, and in some cases more than your hands; it would be a shame not to take advantage. It doesn’t have to be a mushy kiss, or even a romantic one, but something to match the mood; if it’s rough and aggressive, give an assertive kiss!
Talk Dirty
Now dirty talk doesn’t mean talk to us the same way you hear in porn’s (unless you’re into that type of thing, in which case go for it), but adding the right dialogue to sex can be so amazingly hot. Tell them to talk to you: Ask they’re doing it right, tell us how good we feel…. Again the possibilities are endless, just keep it sexy.
Find Our Spots
It seems like the go to spot is our neck, and while that does feel good, it’s not the only spot that makes us go crazy. Don’t let them forget to kiss all over your stomach, trace your back with their tongue, run their fingers up the length of your legs, and nibble on your ear. Our body is their playground, don’t let them stay in one area; let them play until they’ve found all of them.
Remember better sex does not mean extra acrobatic stunts in the bedroom. Sometimes less is more. Now, I want you to do me a favor and try at least two off this list mid sha-bang, and tell me if they’ve worked for you: did you have better sex after-all, or am I tripping? Let me know! What’s the worse that can happen? An amazing, knee locking, toe curling orgasm? Doesn’t sound so bad if you think about it. Happy Sexing!
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